Then they told me we were going to Souplantation to celebrate a cousin's 12th birthday.
Souplantation?
You're kidding? I had never been.
They had. Plenty of times. It's perfect for big family gatherings.
Curious, I had to witness my "Chinese food only please" relatives eating salad, pasta, clam chowder...
Despite the all you can eat buffet, I stuck to salad. This surprised my relatives and they are quite direct. They don't waste any time telling you you've gained weight, look older, and wasted your freedom in America pursuing the arts. So my aunt told me she thought for sure, starving artist, and so Americanized, I would be piling on the plate, gobbling, gobbling, gobbling.
Did you eat beforehand?
No.
What do you guys eat at home?
Oh dear. Trick question.
Every meal I've had at Auntie's house has been Chinese. My Uncle claimed that was the only thing he'd ever eat, and I believed him until last Sunday when I saw him gnaw at a baked potato. For Mother's Day, next Sunday, I was told specifically to bring Chinese food. None of that American stuff. I noticed they didn't tell anyone else this. I was singled out.
So of course, I had to start with an apologetic tone. I'm not sure you would approve. I don't cook Chinese.
Thank goodness for smartphone cameras, huh? It cuts through language barriers. I shared some photos of my creations with them.
Sardines
Black Cod
Pumpkin Chipolte Shrimp
Miso broth halibut, Santa Barbara prawn and mussels
Zucchini Spaghetti w/Tomatoes and Basil
Shaky Beef
Stone Crab Salad
Summer tomatoes
Veal Chop
Branzino with Blood Oranges
Blood orange olive oil cake
Skirt steak, broccolini, eggplant
Beets and Blueberries
Rack of lamb
Garlicky Green Beans
Persimmon salad
Now my relatives want me to open a restaurant. Yeah, right. Investors?
They also want me to cook for them early and often.
The truth does not always set you free. It raises expectations. I might have been much better off with them thinking I ate junk food.
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